Leaping From The Box

There are many things in our current culture that I do not understand.

• Rap and HipHop music (although upon closer listening, there are some similarities between rap and bluegrass)
• Chainsaw / gory / psychological thriller movies
• The fascination with certain “stars” who have done little to nothing to deserve that term
• Preschool

Now I realize that many parents have to work and they figure their children will be more prepared academically for kindergarten and be better socialized in a preschool setting than in a daycare setting. Doesn’t that sound odd? “Be more prepared academically for kindergarten?” Not all that many years ago Kindergarten prepared you for first grade. You did not have to prepare FOR Kindergarten.

What I do not understand is why a parent who chooses to stay at home to raise their child should feel that child would be better off enrolled in a preschool. If you can read and interact with your child, then you can teach your child everything he/she will need to know. It really is not that difficult. Read to them a little bit every day. Talk to them like they are an intelligent human being, rather than your puppy dog. Well, maybe I should not say that because I have seen some people who talk to their dog on a higher vocabulary level than they do their children. Just don’t baby-talk all the time to your child. Involve your child in your every day activities. Let them help with the laundry, sweeping the floor, changing the baby’s diapers, whatever your daily tasks may be. And talk to them while doing so. Explain what you are doing and why. Involve them. Interact with them. It might be fun!

As for socializing, children are much better socialized from being around adults, especially their own family members, and especially the first several years of their lives. Did our pioneers worry about their children’s socialization? For that matter, did our grandparents have preschool? Did our parents? I certainly did not have preschool and I was more than ready for kindergarten when the time came. At what point did preschool become a standard practice? I guess I was bucking the trend when my children were that age, almost twenty years ago. Some days I sure am beginning to feel old!

My list is complete! Well, no, that is definitely not a true statement. I do have more books, more games and more software that I will have to sort through later on. I am just not quite ready to part with it all yet. Or I cannot get to it yet because it is out in the office building and that room needs a massive cleaning just to get into the door! But I do have the math and science books that I sorted out of David’s room last week on a massively long list, complete with descriptions and prices. And there are a few pieces of software added in on the list. If anyone would like to look at the list, you can e-mail me at wdkmg@pipeline.com and I’ll send it to you.

I sorted through my history shelves last December and felt quite proud of how many books I disposed of until Kat remarked that there appeared to be quite a few books still left. And she is right. I had five shelves full of history resources, got rid of probably 40 books or more, and those shelves all still appear to be full. What happened? Must be I had them double shelved, or piled on top of each other. So I need to go over them again with a more ruthless eye.

And then there are my language arts shelves and my biographies shelves and …. Oh, the pain of it all!!!

Oh! And yesterday Bill passed his certification test he has been studying so hard for over the past several weeks. So, in addition to his Microsoft certifications, he is now a CCNA (Cisco Certified Network Associate). Sounds impressive, doesn’t it? Hopefully it will translate into more hiring opportunities in a higher salary bracket!

Today I answered an e-mail from a parent who wondered when to remove her child from public school. The child was bored, the school had said they would provide extra for the child and yet had not, and so the child was beginning to act out his frustrations and boredom. She wondered whether to begin homeschooling him now or to wait until the end of the school year, which was only 2.5 months away. Her main concern seemed to be that homeschooling him now would send the message to her child and to others that bad behavior would get him what he wanted (the child had asked to be homeschooled).

This is not the first time I have heard this concern. For some reason, certain parents tend to view removing the child from the bad situation as a reward, as giving in to the child’s bad behavior. Yet, if the child were to behave well, then there would be no reason for homeschooling? Is the child to continue suffering in his present situation just so he gets the message that acting out will not get him a reward? More likely the message the child is going to get is that no one cares, that all is hopeless, that his life is just going to continue being an ongoing life of frustration and boredom.

Children are pretty much powerless in a public school situation. If they are bored, if they are being bullied, if they are frustrated, if they just plain do not like it there, what are their options? Unless someone is really listening to them, they have only three options:

1) They can tolerate the situation for the coming months, years, a lifetime, until they reach the age when they can drop out or, if they are really patient, graduate. By that time they have lost all hope of a life of interest and have really absorbed the message that learning is no fun at all and not for them.

2) They can act out their frustrations and boredom either by bullying or some other form of destructive behavior. And feel helpless and powerless as their frustration and boredom turns to rage and/or indifference.

3) They can turn their boredom and frustration inwards, becoming depressed and possibly, eventually even suicidal. Only by suicide do they see any way out, any way of taking back control of their lives.

None of those options are good ones, are they? Instead of viewing removal from the public schools as a reward for bad behavior, why not think of it as if public school were a disease which has infected your child and now it is time to remove as much of that disease as possible. If your child had cancer, would you leave the cancer there because removing it would give your child the idea that he would get special attention when he was sick? Or think of public school as an allergy. If your child had an allergy to milk, would you keep forcing him to drink milk? Or would you try some other alternative, like soy milk or coconut milk? Public school is simply one mode of learning among many, one pathway to an education.

Listen to your child. If he is telling you that something is wrong, it is your responsibility to do whatever you can to make the changes needed, changes that will promote your child’s emotional, physical, and mental well-being.